A cut too fine

It's not that I particularly enjoy entering the workplace bearing battle-hardened and war-weary scars around my face resembling craters on the moon. Nor do I intend to be part of any Fight Club and turn up the next day looking like Tyler Durden. When you cut yourself while shaving, you were just zoned out thinking about something, and a nanosecond later yelp in agony. Your face turns crimson red, not because you're blushing at the stupidity of it all, but rather due to the blood gushing out like a faucet.
The next person who points them out will receive a "Do you really want to know how I got these scars?!"